Since leaving my job last August, I can count the number of times I’ve been to gay bars on one hand. Budgeting aside, I came to realize that I was being targeted within the gay community and needed to distance myself to focus on why.
As previously disclosed, I now understand my family was bribing people to provoke and anger me, with the intention that in the chaos I would lash out and cause a disturbance. This way, my family could portray me as mentally unstable and take over the inheritance left to me by my grandfather, either by having me detained or, best case scenario, committing suicide.
Now that I understand my family’s ill intentions for me, until they are brought to justice, I still don’t feel safe within the gay community. While I’ve always taken pride in my independence, I won’t go out alone anymore unless someone asks me to join them, because I fear being attacked or set up (in full disclosure, I’m also usually in bed by 8 now 🥱).
The point of this post isn’t to make any of my friends feel guilty. While most didn’t reach out to me, I also didn’t ask for their help or support. When I was in the worst of the gaslighting late last year, being alone just felt safer.
Above said, I apologize if I made anyone feel guilty if your intention was to give me my space.
On the other hand, if you accepted bribes from my family and spread lies and rumors about me, if wanting to live a life expressed more creatively at a later age was a bridge too far for you and it was just easier or more fun to jump on the rumor bandwagon than to support me while I was ultimately being attacked for being gay, shame on you.
Aside for being victims on my family’s ponzi scheme, as far as I’m concerned you’re nothing more than the stars of my dope show.
Take a bow. I look forward to making examples of each of you.
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