FLUFFER71

Memories rarely find a direct path home. They tend to wander aimlessly until we happen upon them. Sometimes, however, they return like a haunting—an image with no caption, a song that unlocks a feeling, or a photograph that makes a place familiar again. Since turning 50 four years ago, I started stitching together emerging, repressed…

It’s hard to believe that it’s been over two years since I first went into isolation. That makes two years of reliving hypnosis sessions and remembering satanic ritual abuse from my childhood, two years of praying for mercy, hoping that someone who could change my circumstances would have the courage to do so, and two…

I’ve sat down to write this post a dozen times and broke down in tears each time. For the sake of healing from this nightmare that my family forced upon me, today I committed to bringing myself closure. After sharing some of the details last December about the conversion therapy I underwent in 1978, I…

In September 2023 I stumbled across a picture of me and my Mom-Mom taken on Christmas morning 1972. When I came across the old polaroid, I was already 6 months into recouping emerging, repressed childhood memories from when I was 7, which primarily centered around my grandfather helping me select the song “Tiny Dancer” from…

The last time I saw my Grandpa Joe was during a visit to Reading, PA with my mom around 2000. I remember it well because while catching up with him and his wife, my grandfather started crying unexpectedly and, for reasons unbeknownst to me at the time, his eyes were completely locked on me. Seeing…

📸🔙Friday March 26, 2023 – Back to when I began recouping memories of my grandfather helping me choose the song “Tiny Dancer” from a radio. Six months later, I’d recall the reason we were searching for a song. I’d remember my parents had subjected me to gay conversion therapy when I was seven, that the…

👀🔙 to March 17, 2021, when I introduced the Mission Statement ✍️ for Fluffer71… unknowingly at the time, the catalyst video would also become the battle cry of my disco infused, docu-series… “ESCAPE FROM THE OVERLOOK HOTEL” 😱 🎭… the ghostly opera chronicles a young, awkward lad on a quest to become a Braveheart, who…

While I always took pride in being a pragmatic man and scoffed at the concept of ghosts, I’m now a believer. I began “filming” for Fluffer71 on March 13, 2021, which marked the one year anniversary of the night I caught COVID-19, when in my defiance of the city beginning to shut down I went…

While I continue to focus on healing, today’s “on this date” memory hit me right in the feels. Like many of my creative compositions over the years, now that I’m awakened to the horrors of the traumatic childhood memories that my family attempted to erase from me noggin, I find myself profoundly humbled by the…

I figured I’d go old school and take a selfie today. While it’s been awhile, it’s also time to step out of ai-Land and leave my fluffed alter ego behind for now. Like Cellar Doors 14 years ago, Fluffer71 served a purpose in my life. While unbeknownst to me when launching the projects, each was…

It’s hard to throw a man under the bus when he’s the one driving. Before realizing I was being hunted by a handful of criminals and sociopaths hellbent on destroying my reputation and creative expression for financial gain, I had intended to utilize my fluffed alter-ego to place more emphasis on storytelling, like I did…

While being gaslit by my family and bullied into isolation, I reflected a lot on my creative endeavors over the years. Unfortunately for my family and their supporting cast of deplorables, isolating me was where they got it wrong With more time in seclusion, it became increasingly clear that, collectively, my creative manifestations were the…

Never underestimate the power of creativity. I am a testament; the subconscious has a way of manifesting hidden truths. The most humbling aspect of my creative ventures throughout my life comes with the recognition that behind EVERY creative project was a 7 year old boy screaming for me to wake up to my reality. Before…

This past Sunday hit me harder than I anticipated. If you would’ve told me last Mother’s Day that I was about to enter into the War of the Roses (Mother and Son Edition 🌹), besides calling you a liar, I likely would’ve kicked you in the crotch and sprayed you with mace. Despite what we’ve…

Since leaving my job last August, I can count the number of times I’ve been to gay bars on one hand. Budgeting aside, I came to realize that I was being targeted within the gay community and needed to distance myself to focus on why. As previously disclosed, I now understand my family was bribing…

You have to laugh at how born-again Christians assume that if Jesus were to return, he’d whip out a semiautomatic and take out all the gays. By definition apocalypse is the moment when the forces of good overtake the powers of evil. In my humble opinion, if Jesus were to walk on this rock again,…

Following my father’s death in 2020, I recognized that had it been me that died of COVID-19, I would’ve done so feeling unfulfilled in this lifetime. When I quit my job last August, I explained to my mother that I was investing in time, which she refused to comprehend. Instead she barraged me with questions…

Up through the end of 2nd grade, I was an outgoing, happy go lucky, mischievous kid. My biggest crime back then was joining the other boys in class and sneaking up behind girls and lifting their skirts, because we found their reactions funny (in our defense, the girls were totally gross 🤮). 3rd grade, however,…

After connecting the dots in recent months and sharing that my family has been trafficking me since 1978, I received a text from my old employer last week. To say the conversation creeped me out would be an understatement. He used assumptive statements like “you’re depressed”, advised me not to share personal information on a…

Prior to 2020, Saint Patrick’s Day was a day to drink and celebrate life. 4 years ago today, however, that changed after going to bed with chills and waking up with COVID-19 the next morning. However celebratory the day had been, in spirit Saint Patrick’s Day evolved more into a day to hit pause and…

When you realize Grandpa Joe was actually Willy Wonka… and why it took him so long to get out of bed. 😢 I’m coming to learn that the hardest part of my journey over the past few months isn’t family betrayal. As my childhood slowly unravels before me, what breaks me ticker most is remembering…

This is the point on the timeline where we flip the script. After 4 decades, I’m checking out of the Overlook Hotel. I did what men before me couldn’t. I survived the blizzards, mazes, illusions, and sinister intentions of the walls intended to imprison me. Turns out, the place just needed some redecorating. I went…

Given my mother’s instability and her Christmas tirade yesterday, I wanted to summarize the case at hand due to her long history of unethical behavior. Donna Brooke Knehr Wallace and Pat Wallace Hoffman are part of a secret ‘religious’ society. For whatever the reason, in the summer of 1978 they were paid by this cult…

I hope you all had a good Christmas. Mine was good until I received a slew of threats from my mother this afternoon. She informed she hated me, that no one in my family supports me, and threatened to report me to the State of California for claiming unemployment because she assumed I was someone…